Friday, July 19, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

Marge, don't discourage the boy! Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals! Except the weasel!

Homer Simpson

Thursday, July 18, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

Dear Abby: I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of money to do it. Have you any suggestions? —M.J.B. in Oakland, Calif.
Dear M.J.B.: Yes. Run for a public office.

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

“Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair.”– Sam Ewing

Tuesday, July 16, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

“Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.” 
― Steven Wright

Monday, July 15, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

The doctor looked my body over. I said: Is there any hope? He said: Yes. Reincarnation.

Phyllis Diller

Friday, July 12, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

“The job isn't done until you've blamed someone for the parts that went wrong.” 
― Scott Adams, Dilbert's Guide to the Rest of Your Life: Dispatches from Cubicleland (Scott Adams, is a Bestselling Comedy Writer, Creator of the Dilbert Comic Strip)

Thursday, July 11, 2019

A Touch Of Humor

“Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly and applying the wrong remedies.” 
― Groucho Marx