Thursday, October 1, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

I discovered my wife in bed with another man, and I was crushed. So I said, 'Get off me, you two!'

Emo Phillips

Wednesday, September 30, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

Doritos has launched a new flavor called 'Twisted Lime,' despite promising back in 2016 not to release any new flavors in the last year of a president's term.

Seth Meyers

Tuesday, September 29, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

[From the smokey California air] Last night I heard the coyotes outside my window. They were coughing at the moon.

Bill Maher

Monday, September 28, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

It’s 38 days before the election. It feels less like an election and more like a going out of business sale.

Bill Maher

Friday, September 25, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

New Rule: The veterinarians at a Polish zoo who say they’ve been conducting a study of the stress relieving affect of marijuana on elephants have to admit what really happened. You’re high and someone said, ‘let’s get the elephants stoned’ and you did!

Bill Maher

Thursday, September 24, 2020

A Touch Of Humor

Simpson Marriage Counseling Session:

Homer: Marge, this is embarrassing. We don’t need counseling.

Marge: We do need counseling. I’m carrying a lot of anger!

Homer: Just do what I do. Come home and have a hot dinner waiting for you.

Wednesday, September 23, 2020