Friday, October 19, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. Steve Martin

Thursday, October 18, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

Whenever someone calls me ugly I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired. Will Ferrell

Wednesday, October 17, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

I failed kindergarten because I couldn’t spell my last name. Zach Galifianakis

Tuesday, October 16, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

If America leads a blessed life, then why did God put all of our oil under people who hate us? Jon Stewart

Monday, October 15, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

Do we have to worry about who’s gay and who’s straight? Can’t we just love everybody and judge them by the car they drive? Ellen DeGeneres

Friday, October 12, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. Rodney Dangerfield

Thursday, October 11, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

“Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.” 
― Steve Martin

Wednesday, October 10, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.

But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he had grown in seven years."

Mark Twain

Tuesday, October 9, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

  • A group of scientists in Singapore built a robot that can put together Ikea furniture. That's when you know something's wrong, when it's easier to build a robot than an Ikea dresser. - Jimmy Fallon

Monday, October 8, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

The investment banking firm Goldman Sachs joined Instagram in an attempt to endear themselves to a new generation. Today, Goldman posted a meme that said, "We're the reason your parents lost your childhood home." - Conan O'Brien

Friday, October 5, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

  • Dunkin' Donuts is now selling its first ever gluten free product. It’s called a “cup.” - Seth Meyers

Thursday, October 4, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

Weight Watchers announced it's changing its name. They've changed their name to "Screw It, Have the Fudge." - Conan O'Brien


Wednesday, October 3, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

President Trump said in a new interview that he is an "absolute 'no' on possible statehood for Puerto Rico." And then — this is concerning — he said the same thing about Vermont. - Seth Meyers

Tuesday, October 2, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

North and South Korea say they want to host the 2032 Summer Olympics together. The highlight will be when the athletes try pole-vaulting from North Korea into South Korea. 

- Jimmy Fallon

Monday, October 1, 2018

A Touch Of Humor

Alaska Airlines might start giving out virtual reality headsets to first-class passengers. Meanwhile, if you're in coach, they just duct tape an in-flight magazine to your forehead.

Jimmy Fallon