A Touch of Humor

 

"I feel bad for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day."

Frank Sinatra (1915 - 1998) (Singer, Actor, and Legendary Entertainer)

A Touch of Humor

 

"I intend to live forever. So far, so good."

Steven Wright (1955 - ) (Comedian Known for Deadpan One-Liners)

A Touch of Humor

 

"I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something."

Jackie Mason (1928 - 2021) (Stand-Up Comedian and Comic Storyteller)

A Touch of Humor

 

"People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day."

Winnie-the-Pooh (1926 - ) (Beloved Literary Character and Accidental Philosopher)

A Touch of Humor

 

"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them."

Phyllis Diller (1917 - 2012) (Pioneering Stand-Up Comedian and Actress)

A Touch of Humor

 

"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult."

Rita Rudner (1953 - ) (Comedian, Actress, and Best-Selling Author)

A Touch of Humor

 

"I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either."

Jack Benny (1894 - 1974) (Radio, Television, and Vaudeville Legend)