A Touch Of Humor

Friday, September 18, 2026

"Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons."

Woody Allen (1935 - ) (Filmmaker, Writer, Actor, and Comedian)

"Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your children."

Sam Levenson (1911 - 1980) (Humorist, Author, Television Host, and Teacher)

"I've reached an age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me."

Unknown (Classic Aging One-Liner)

"A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory."

Steven Wright (1955 - ) (Stand-Up Comedian and Master of Deadpan One-Liners)

"Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."

Billy Sunday (1862 - 1935) (Evangelist, Former Baseball Player, and Colorful Public Speaker)

"Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair."

George Burns (1896 - 1996) (Beloved Comedian, Actor, and Master of the One-Liner)

"I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."

Tom Waits (1949 - ) (Singer, Songwriter, Actor, and Celebrated Raconteur)