A study of economics usually reveals that the best time to buy anything is last year.
Marty Allen
Friday, April 29, 2022
Thursday, April 28, 2022
Wednesday, April 27, 2022
A Touch of Humor
By working faithfully eight hours a day you may eventually get to be boss and work twelve hours a day.
Robert Frost
Tuesday, April 26, 2022
A Touch of Humor
A black cat crossing your path signifies that the animal is going somewhere.
Groucho Marx
Monday, April 25, 2022
A Touch of Humor
Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile.
Billy Sunday
Friday, April 22, 2022
A Touch of Humor
I dream of a better tomorrow, where chickens can cross the road and not be questioned about their motives.
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Thursday, April 21, 2022
Wednesday, April 20, 2022
A Touch of Humor
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
Bill Waterson
Tuesday, April 19, 2022
Monday, April 18, 2022
Friday, April 15, 2022
A Touch of Humor
When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.
Albert Einstein
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/funny-quotes_5Thursday, April 14, 2022
A Touch of Humor
I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.
Richard Lewis
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/funny-quotes_4Wednesday, April 13, 2022
A Touch of Humor
Only the mediocre are always at their best.
Jean Giraudoux
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/topics/funny-quotesTuesday, April 12, 2022
A Touch of Humor
People who say they don't care what people think are usually desperate to have people think they don't care what people think.
George Carlin
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/george-carlin-quotesMonday, April 11, 2022
A Touch of Humor
Every time I go and shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving. So I say, 'I'm gonna go shave, too.'
Mitch Hedberg
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/mitch-hedberg-quotesFriday, April 8, 2022
A Touch of Humor
"Badges? We ain't got no badges! We don't need no badges! I don't have to show you any stinking badges!"
THE TREASURE OF THE SIERRA MADRE, Warner Bros., 1948
Thursday, April 7, 2022
Wednesday, April 6, 2022
A Touch of Humor
"You can't fool me! There ain't no sanity clause!"
- Chico Marx, A Night at the Opera (1935)
Tuesday, April 5, 2022
A Touch of Humor
I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'Where's the self-help section?' She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
George Carlin
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/george-carlin-quotesMonday, April 4, 2022
A Touch of Humor
An escalator can never break: it can only become stairs. You should never see an Escalator Temporarily Out Of Order sign, just Escalator Temporarily Stairs. Sorry for the convenience.
Mitch Hedberg
Read more at https://www.brainyquote.com/authors/mitch-hedberg-quotes
Friday, April 1, 2022
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