A Touch Of Humor

• Microsoft is working on technology that removes the need for cashiers and checkout lines. This cutting-edge technology is known as "shoplifting." - Conan O'Brien

A Touch Of Humor

"When trouble arises and things look bad, there is always one individual who perceives a solution and is willing to take command. Very often, that individual is crazy. ” 

― Dave Barry

A Touch Of Humor

• First lady Melania Trump made a surprise trip to the U.S.-Mexico border today and visited a facility holding migrant children. "I can't imagine what terrible things you've been through," said one of the kids to Melania. - Seth Meyers

A Touch Of Humor

• Today, first lady Melania Trump made a surprise visit to the U.S.-Mexico border. And this isn't good — she brought her passport and everything she owns. - Jimmy Fallon

A Touch Of Humor

• According to a new report, legal marijuana sales in Colorado have seen a plateau in growth. Apparently, people are still going to the marijuana stores, but they can't remember why they went in. - Seth Meyers

A Touch Of Humor

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

Mark Twain

A Touch Of Humor

“All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed.
For after all, he was only human. He wasn't a dog.”
― Charles M. Schulz ("Peanuts" Creator)