A Touch Of Humor: August 2026

Friday, August 7, 2026

"Opportunity may knock only once, but temptation leans on the doorbell."

Opie Read (1852 - 1939) (Journalist, Novelist, and Humorist)

"If you can't laugh at yourself, I'd be happy to do it for you."

Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977) (Legendary Comedian, Actor, and Master of the Quick Wit)

"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred."

Woody Allen (1935 - ) (Comedian, Writer, Actor, and Filmmaker)

"I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous—everyone hasn't met me yet."

Rodney Dangerfield (1921 - 2004) (Stand-Up Legend and Master of Self-Deprecating Humor)

"My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way."

Henny Youngman (1906 - 1998) (Legendary One-Liner Comic and the "King of the One-Liners")