A Touch Of Humor

In an auditorium filled with people, Claude the hypnotist exclaimed: "I'm here to put you into a trance;

I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience." The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations" He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch..." The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs eyes followed the swaying watch, until, suddenly, it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces. "SH*T!" said the Hypnotist. It took three days to clean up the auditorium.

Unijokes.com

A Touch Of Humor

Six Flags announced that it will reopen it’s theme parks in California next month. When I asked if it was safe they said, ‘I mean it’s as safe as we’ve ever been.’

Seth Meyers

A Touch Of Humor

 A man is talking to the family doctor, "Doc, I think my wife’s going deaf."

The doctor answers, "Well, here’s something you can try on her to test her hearing. Stand some distance away from her and ask her a question. If she doesn’t answer, move a little closer and ask again. Keep repeating this until she answers. Then you’ll be able to tell just how hard of hearing she really is." The man goes home and tries it out. He walks in the door and says, "Honey, what’s for dinner?" He doesn’t hear an answer, so he moves closer to her. "Honey, what’s for dinner?" Still no answer. He repeats this several times, until he’s standing just a few feet away from her. Finally, she answers, "For the eleventh time, I said we’re having MEATLOAF!"

Unijokes.com 

A Touch Of Humor

Some entertainment news. I saw that Vin Diesel is going to star in a live action movie based on the old toy Rock ‘Em, Sock ‘Em Robots. Say what you want but it’s nice to finally see a human taking over a robot’s job.

Jimmy Fallon

A Touch Of Humor

A new study has found that your dog gets jealous just imagining you with another canine. But it also found that your cat never thinks about you at all.

Stephen Colbert

A Touch of Humor

“A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: ‘Duh.'” – Conan O’Brien

A Touch Of Humor

“… We are all here on earth to help others: what on earth the others are here for, I don’t know…”

W.H. Auden 1907 - 1973) (Famed Poet, Professor)

From my sister Lorrie Kazan’s Prosperity Meditation