"Why do people give each other flowers! To celebrate various important occasions , they're killing living creatures. Why restrict it to plants? Sweetheart, let's make up. Have this deceased squirrel."
Jerry Seinfeld
Friday, June 3, 2016
A Touch Of Humor
"Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge."
Jerry Seinfeld
Jerry Seinfeld
A Touch Of Humor
"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better."
Ellen DeGeneres
Ellen DeGeneres
A Touch Of Humor
"You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is."
Ellen DeGeneres
Ellen DeGeneres
A Touch Of Humor
"Some people have a way with words, and other people ... oh, uh, not have way."
Steve Martin
Steve Martin
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